It's sooo hot today! Jamie is feeding more frequently during the day than usual but then I can't blame him - I'm drinking glass after glass of water myself! We had to go to the hospital this morning to have my abscess checked, and it was sooo hot in there. AND we had to wait ages. Then we went to tesco which was mental busy. It's only a 5 min drive from home but I felt bad subjecting J to the hot car even for that long. I need a car with air con!!

I have managed to get tons of clothes washed and dried today so the heat does have some advantages!

My abscess is healing well and I'm still breastfeeding. I really thought I was going to stop - I wasn't sure how much more I could take - but I've kept going and fingers crossed, it's all going to be ok from now on. Jamie is taking a lot less time to feed - about 20-30 mins, and he usually goes 3 hours in between. He's still doing great at night - he usually goes from 11pm til 6/7am. I hope it lasts!

I'm going through a bit of a rough time at the moment and my little man is being so amazing, and I wanted to share that for the past couple of nights he has...

slept through the night!!

...from about 11pm til 6.30-7am!

I know it probably won't last but I'm enjoying it while it does. I haven't really had any extra sleep because I've been waking at 5 through habit and then lying awake watching him to see when he'll wake up.

He's been such an angel in the day as well - I've had to go back to hospital most days because of the breast abscess, including another trip to A&E yesterday, and he's had to put up with sitting in waiting rooms for ages, going backwards and forwards in a hot car, etc etc, and he's just been lovely and smiley the whole time.

OK, gush over - I've got to get us both ready to be at the hospital by 10!

Feeling poorly...

I developed mastitis over the weekend - my right breast got really lumpy and hot and red on the outside. It didn't really hurt, so I kept feeding from it and it seemed to not be getting any worse. I felt OK in myself - didn't have a temperature or anything, so I thought I was going to be ok. As it was the weekend I decided to wait til today to go to the GP. STUPID me! I woke up at 2am with a painful swollen lump on my boob, which was also bright red and the skin was all stretched and shiny. Luckily it didn't actually hurt too much unless prodded. As J wasn't due a feed and was sleeping soundly, I expressed off as much as I could and then lay awake worrying until he woke up at 5. Fed him, but it felt as though the milk wasn't flowing too well from the infected breast.

This morning I managed to get an emergency appointment with my GP, who took one look, said I had developed a breast abscess, and referred me straight to hospital. Luckily Wayne wasn't working so he was able to take me and J to A&E. We were seen by a surgeon who was able to use a needle to drain all the cr*p out of the abscess (sorry TMI!), and I have to take antibiotics for a week and go to the breast clinic at the hospital on Weds to be checked. I have to say, the standard and speed of care really impressed me - I was expecting to be waiting for hours but I was seen really quickly and the procedure was done almost straight away.

Feeling really down now - I've struggled a lot with BFing but recently everything had been so much better - feeds now only take 30 mins or so and he goes 3 hours in between them. Now this had happened :( I am going to keep going with BFing, but I feel quite despondent about it all - I've tried so hard with it and I feel like I'm due a break!!

Have to say though, Jamie has been an angel for the past few days and was lovely in the hospital - cooing and smiling lots. Not the way I wanted to spend his 2 month "birthday" though.

Took Jamie into work today for the end of term BBQ. So many people are leaving - I'm not going to know anyone when I go back! Jamie was an angel, he slept through all the leaving speeches and then I gave him a bottle of expressed milk (didn't fancy BFing in front of my colleagues!) and he was passed around for some cuddles. Lots of people said he looks like me, which I'm pleased about because so far people have only said that he looks like Wayne!!

Well we're back from taking Jamie for his jabs. He was such a brave little soldier!! First he was weighed and measured - he's now 10lb 3oz so is gaining weight steadily (he was 7lb 4oz at birth), then he had to wait to see the doctor, who checked him over, and all was fine. Then we went in for the jabs. He screamed just after the nurse had done the first one, a different sort of cry to what I've heard before. He must have wondered what the hell was happening!! Once we'd got him dressed and back in the pram he fell straight to sleep and is still asleep now. We're supposed to keep him cool and check to make sure he doesn't get a temperature. Poor little thing, and he has to go through it all again in 4 weeks!

A bit later... Well I think the jabs have affected him - he slept from 12 til 2pm, and then I woke him up for a feed, then he went straight back to sleep from 3-5pm and again I had to wake him to feed him and do his bath. I NEVER normally have to wake him for a feed... He's not asleep yet now but seems quieter than usual. He doesn't seem hot (he's generally quite a warm-feeling baby anyway) so hopefully he's ok, poor little monkey!

I'm starting to feel that the time is whizzing by now. Each Wednesday when Jamie gets a week older comes round so fast. I'm trying to make the most of every moment, even if I'm knackered, because I know for sure that when I'm back at work I'll be desperate to have this time back again. Jamie is still in newborn clothes, but I guess he'll be moving onto 0-3 month ones soon, which is a bit scary! He got given a lot of 3-6 month outfits and they still look absolutely MASSIVE, I can't imagine him being that big!!

Well the BFing without shields is still going well, better than I could have expected. I really thought I'd end up giving up for good. Feeds are a lot shorter and Jamie is sometimes managing to go 3 hours between feeds in the day (although sometimes it's only 2). The fact that his feeds are so much shorter means I have a lot more time to get stuff done, so I'm finally beginning to tackle 7 weeks worth of dust!! He seems to be getting into a bit more of a pattern with sleeping in the day too. Today he slept from 9-10am and just dropped off at 12.30pm. I'm hoping I'll get time for some lunch before he wakes up again!

I've just been over to tesco with him in the sling, he must've looked cute as he got lots of admiring glances! I'll probably take him to the park this afternoon - it's nice to get out after yesterday's rain deluge!

We've taken Jamie on his first holiday, down to sunny (not!) Devon for a few days. It was an interesting experience taking a 6 week old camping, but he was actually really good and slept well - I think the sea air was good for him! Wayne got to do some surfing and also took Jamie fishing - well for about 20 mins until he'd had enough and started screaming!



I'm still struggling a bit with breastfeeding and am considering introducing some formula. I'm still using nipple shields because my nips have STILL not fully healed. But I think the shields make it harder for Jamie to get the milk, which makes feeds take ages and he never seems satisfied - he'll want to feed again 20 minutes after finishing. He seems to have turned into a snacker! I know this is normal in the early days but I did think things would be getting better by now and I'd have more of a break in between feeds. I know he's getting enough to eat because of his weight gain and the tons of pooey nappies he produces... I just kind of feel that I'm not enjoying him as much as I should be because I feel like all I do is feed. Going out anywhere stresses me out because I never know when the next feed will be or how long it will take. And I get nothing done around the house because I'm sat on my bum all day! Everyone says "it will get easier" - and it has - but I thought I'd have it mastered by now and I really haven't.

I think I'm going to bite the bullet and ditch the nipple shields for a couple of days, and see if that makes the feeds a bit shorter and whether Jamie seems happier afterwards and goes a bit longer in between. I'm worried my nipples will start bleeding again but I feel like I have to give proper breastfeeding one more go before resorting to formula. If I did introduce formula it would probably be just in the day - I'd still try and BF him first thing in the morning, in the evening and in the middle of the night. I really wanted to BF him exclusively and I know I'll feel guilty if I can't. Oh well, we'll see how it goes.